Featured

THE ONE LOVE…

People say you know, when you fall in love, and its the best feeling you could ever feel or come across with,when we see the other person we feel butterflies in our stomach,holding their hands makes your heart pound crazily.Love is more than that.Its not always like a pretty garden of roses,it is also full of thorns.

It’s funny how every time we find a person who tends to understand us and treat us well and we start believing its love.Until one day when either of us gets tired or more commonly we term it as “The spark is not here anymore”.I never understand how could you unlove a person,fall out of love, because when you love truly,you see past the smile the other person puts on,you see how weird ,how imperfect and how bad a person can be but still you love them , you still look into their eyes and you start losing yourself in them.How can all of these end?How can the other person stop being themselves?How can you stop loving the other person while the person is and will always remain the person you loved?

We don’t go walking into the streets looking out for love, we come across it at the most unexpected time and with the unexpected person.We like so many people, date them,love them, but when love is in its purest form it lasts,but if it doesn’t that does not mean the love was not true but this might have not been the ONE LOVE which happens to people at certain point in their lives.We fall in love with a person and we don’t expect them to love us back*though we keep on hoping for it*, we keep loving them with all the love we have.No matter with whom we end up, no other person can replace the love we have for this person,and when this person loves us back,OMG! we can’t expect anything else which would feel better.

I met him through a common friend on Facebook in 2014, we texted for hours, talked about tons of things,I felt like I could talk to him about anything, put down my walls for him, I felt he was different from what experiences I had in the past.One year passed, we had our share of fights, I was too naive to see behind everything he faked.Yes,he did.He cheated on me.I didn’t knew how to accept that.I left.Only to feel the worst I can ever feel,I self-harmed,i stopped being around people,I stopped believing in myself.Did he break me?No, he didn’t,he did much worse,he crushed me totally. I had always read about “Happy Endings” all my life,but not everything had to end on a happy note.I blamed myself for his mistakes,the things I wasn’t responsible for.I couldn’t forgive myself for letting him go, not realizing that one at fault was him.Although I avoided him,I kept a look at him.I did love him.

A year later*I dated a couple of guys but never found myself complete* we reconciled again on July 18,2016, but this time not for once I felt him acting cold, I could feel true affection,care and warmth.Since then I have seen myself in him.Words fall short if I try to explain how happy I’ve been.Its not a fairytale kind of relationship.We fight, and by fight I don’t mean small arguments,we have major fights but the better side is how fast we fall back together,it isn’t the times when we look our best and can’t stop staring at each other, it’s when we are completely a mess but still we find each other the most attractive and adorable person ever, the phone calls when we sound so good and cute aren’t the best ones, its our broken voices from the morning which makes us fall in love more every second.

I have never been a self confident person, I never found myself beautiful,I felt insecure about the way my body looks.Everyone of us are scared of being ridiculed for not being good enough for our respective partners.Believe me when you find the right person, they will look at you like they can’t see anybody else,its only you that have mesmerized them.So did he.He made me start loving myself for the person I am, he made me appreciate myself,he doesn’t let me fall, when people are bad to me he doesn’t let me feel down.He is imperfectly perfect the way he is.For the first few months, I still couldn’t trust him.But he earned it.I trust him completely now.

But like every rose has its thorn even he has his share of flaws, but that is him.I accepted him for the way he is, the way he accepted me.

He has not always been on the bright side,not always been the angelic kind of person that he is now, he has had his period of being shady, he had been the kind of devil that walks around breaking hearts and bringing down people.I was one of them until he changed.Changed for good.

I read this quote once,that saidYou don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world…but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices.
John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

I chose him,I still can’t believe it,but I did.And if this time I get hurt I would still take it as a privilege to have had ended things with him on a better note than our past.

I fall in love with him every day,every minute.And by the looks of it I can proudly say I am love with one of the most beautiful hearts.Now that I know him I know why was he a certain way in his past.He had his insecurities, just like I did,which made him a person what he never was.He always wanted a person who would love him for what he is and not what he showed he was,and maybe this is why he loves me now. 🙂 He loves the way no one did,listens to me the way no one tries to, he broke my walls helping me face things I feared.

I don’t think we are going to stop loving each other for the bad we have been or the flaws we have.We complete each other.And today after our relationship completed a year, I am sure we got a long way to go on.He changed me,made me believe in love again and today the reason I am happy and smiling is because I know he has got my back and he won’t let me fall.And oh yes,he asked me to marry him.I said YES!! *duh! obviously*.He wants to get engaged soon*we didn’t because we are in a long distance relationship*.

I am so lucky to love him.He doesn’t realize how perfect I find him. ❤

I really hope all of you reading this whether seperated or single find someone you can’t live without,one who completes you,one who is ready to make sacrifices and grow with you.I am certain you will find that person, but first love yourself,self-love is the most important love.

And all those pretty lil souls who are in love already, I really wish that you stay in love forever,loving each other ,annoying them and supporting them throughout the thick and thin.

“True love doesn’t come to you it has to be inside you.” ~Julia Roberts

Keep smiling 🙂 Lots of Love ❤ xx

Follow on Instagram – sinhanamy97

Like on Facebook – Simply You(namratasinhablog)

Advertisements
Featured

I learnt being… Happy! <3

Growing up all these years till nineteen what I am now , my dad had been my only true friend, because the so called “friends” I was surrounded with all my life until 2 years ago were never really the kind of people who actually tried to get past the walls I surrounded myself with and help me accept myself.*exceptions exist* . I was never really bothered about trying to fit into the crowd until I completed my seventh grade,when you apparently had to be the kind of cool, where you aren’t a bookworm but rather a bully , you keep yourself updated to the fashion going on around , carrying all the latest trends and having that OOMPH factor in that smirk of yours, not to forget possessing all the high end designer wears or the latest gadgets and mind you and any of the above requirements are unchecked ,I’m sorry honey , YOU DON’T FIT IN! Why? Oh because these are the *unsaid but mandatory*rules we need to follow,right?! And what if we don’t ? Poor you, you will be bullied till you are drained out of all the self-confidence and you become self-conscious and hate yourself for the way you are.

Being bullied is one of the major fears in schools and colleges that the kids and mostly the teens lose their originality for and change themselves into something even they don’t recognize in front of the mirror.Our talents, which makes us different from the others start becoming our greatest fears , because we start fearing what if we get shamed for being capable of doing something that the others can’t.Hence, we give up trying and end up missing our chance of being somebody who can be influential, and all this for what? Only because some people don’t approve of it.

Why should we give in to these bullies? We think they are better than us in every manner and we feel like trash . Lets us get one thing straight,shall we? The ones who bully us are more weaker at the core than us. They bully us to simply get an ego stroke to their self esteem,bullying us makes them feel stronger. Don’t let a couple of people decide what you should be doing with your life , you need to take a hold of it and reach the heights where no one thought of you reaching. Your goals, dreams , destiny is yours and no one else’s , so don’t let anyone come in between and make you give up.

Being shamed for all these years for being healthy and chubby as compared to girls of my age with perfect bodies made me feel low, made me scared going out in public crowds.Being called chinki or chini or even questions asked like “How do you manage to see through those little eyes?” made me start wearing eye make ups trying to hide my flaw*what now I am in love it*. Being tall attracted many questions to me like “How is the whether up there?” which left me embarrassed and hence making me give up on wearing heels.Being called by words like “moti” *fatty in hindi* made me wear clothes in which I felt maybe I am not looking much fat in it, I still remember the worse kind of days of being humiliated publicly for it and on top of it my short cropped hair never really helped any of it only made it worse.I changed,lost weight in my 11th and 12th grade , starving myself , reading articles on net and eating foods accordingly, and got what? Disappointment. Why now, I was thin now right and even with long hairs? Because I was naive enough to believe in guys who said they loved me, got my heart broken many a times.

Then came the “Trying to socialize phase” where I made some more friends , went out on late night parties, started smoking , drinking. I felt now I got friends , guys texting me, slimmer-than-before body so I should be happy. In the beginning being a rebel felt cool and fun, not listening to what people said or nor even my own family. But yes again at certain point I felt I was not at peace, not happy.

But then I met this guy who seemed different and I was head over heels in love with him, but he ended up being the jerk like many others.The next couple of years I kept crying myself to sleep at night but also started figuring out my life.Until quite recently when the same guy started feeling the same way for me and became my world.*will surely make a blog on that* and also I found the best of my friends, and I found myself nowhere but at peace.

Today,after 2 years of me moving to Agartala for my graduation I am at a certain place from where no one can bring me down , because I learnt from my dark days, I learnt smiling for no reason, I learnt being satisfied for what I have and what I am, I learnt loving myself and most importantly I learnt being HAPPY without depending on anyone.

Keep smiling =). Lots of love ❤ xx

Social Contacts:

Instagram – sinhanamy97

Snapchat – sinhanamy97

Facebook – Namrata D Sinha(https://www.facebook.com/namrata.sinha.714)

Love Yourself… ❤

Everyone of us are insecure about ourselves, we think we aren’t good enough, we don’t look a certain way or probably another person is better at things or looks than us. What we don’t know is that, every single one of us are fighting their own demons,and every single day is a new battle to be fought.

We all have scars from our past and battle wounds which we are afraid to show to others , we get insecure about them. But we must know we are not alone, and everyone has their own story and scars , we should be proud of our scars cause those are the proof that we fought and survived our wars and have grown anew.

There are going to be people judging you for your looks,your nature, your gender, colour and what not. Dont let those sink in , as, if you do so,the devils of insecurity, low-esteem, anxiety starts over powering you. Love yourself, for it is the only true love that exists, if you learn to love yourself as you are and be thankful for everything you got , nothing or no one can stop you from being happy, learn from your past mistakes , learn not to depend on people for your happiness, learn to be happy even when no one’s around.

Let me tell you my own little story : I got a huge brown scar on the right side of my belly which stopped me from wearing crop tops or any outfit that would reveal the mark,(the mark was on my tummy since I have been a baby). I have also been insecure about my height and restricted myself from wearing heels. I wanted to wear those but never did. Until quite recently someone told me ” Imperfections are beautiful” I realized no one is completely perfect , we all are perfectly imperfect. And you know what? I am totally happy about it and proud of whoever I am, cause I know no one else can be me.

Love yourself, for you never know what tomorrow brings 😉😘 xx

Lots of love❤ Keep smiling ☺ xx

Social accounts:

Facebook: Namrata D Sinha

Instagram: sinhanamy97

Snapchat: sinhanamy97

Twitter: Namrata9497

LET IT GO… CAN’T HOLD IT BACK ANYMORE

I’ve always been the good girl what people wanted me to be,the way they wanted me to talk,smile,behave ,walk , I have always been a puppet to fit into the crowd. Never for once anybody bothered to ask me was I happy. No one ever turned out to be my true friend ,no one stayed by my side just for me instead ,they always had their own selfish needs.

There are tons of girls out there who are having it hard growing up and facing high schools and college has its own ups and downs. This is for all of you ,my girls. I know how hard it is to keep it all inside and still manage to crack a smile while nobody watches you cry when you stay alone.You’re stronger than this, don’t let the people in and don’t let them know what you really are until they truly deserve you. You are precious and not meant to be hurt over and over again.

I have been told I am cold towards people.I am sarcastic and ignorant and I do what I feel without thinking what image of mine will that create amongst the people. I am selfish and I hurt people. But no one bothered to know whats the truth, was I the one that did wrong or was I the one that was wronged by people?Have they seen the countless nights I spent crying ,tired of making people understand that I was the one who was hurt.

This article is totally about this particular guy whom I dated in college.In the start it was totally fun, we didn’t bothered about what was coming for us unless I started liking him.When I did, he left me behind for a different girl.Going to college with a smiling face watching both of them at the last bench too close ,talking over not so important things, eating their lunch together pained me because someday it was me and I was so easily replaced.I could not utter a word to anyone how suffocated I felt every single day watching them and I being his best friend all through it and whenever he messed up with her I was the one to hold him, pick him up and push him towards her,only I knew how bad that felt but I did.And he just kept stepping over me just to get to her without a single thought about me. All I did all those days was hide myself inside rooms or in the corners and cry myself out and just come out with a lifeless fake smile which he actually took to be true.I always stayed behind the curtains waiting for being there for him and pick him up whenever he would fall.

A day did come when she left him and he just ran behind and fell over me because I have had been his safety net all this while. I let myself be the option.But not anymore,I wont let myself be controlled over by this mere infatuation anymore.I have given up and yes moved on for good.And returning back on that path is impossible ,because as I was moving on I erased the path I came along.He had me,as a best friend, a sister ,a partner and all he did was lose all of it by him own.He never loved me and he still doesn’t ,he just is habituated of my presence all along.But certain things he said made him lose that friend too. I guess,now I know why she left him too.I have just been too blind to see that.He can never hold onto the things and people close and that makes me feel sorry for him. I forgive him for everything he did and I forgive myself for allowing myself to be hurt by him again and again.

I have found what I have been looking for all this while,and this new love of mine is something I will never go, because he chose me besides everything and I love him and some old shit what people think was love cant come in between.I love him because he held my hand and helped me be myself and I finally rose up like the break of dawn and I can breathe free and I am going to be forever thankful.

I have been told I am not pretty or undesirable too. Huh? I am not perfect. Guess what? I really don’t care about any of it anyway. People can say whatever they feel.Going to them to prove that I am not a certain type of person they think me to be , isn’t my thing now. If this makes me cold, sarcastic and ignorant then I am quite happy being it.I am bound by no more rules,no fears,no rights or wrongs.I have turned my back to that world and slammed the door shut , I am not going back to it anymore.Whats the past is in the past.

Time taught me many things , I have grown stronger, I don’t cry over the scars and bruises I have anymore. I am proud of them , I am proud of myself that I have lived all of it and instead of hiding the wounds and scars I show them off.I show off, of what is left of the wars I have fought with people and the more dangerous wars were the ones that I fought with myself and the fears that always controlled me.

I have finally let go of all the things that kept bothering me and I feel free.If letting go of all that leaves me all alone ,I wouldn’t mind. I will build my own Kingdom and be the Queen of it. I only need me and nobody else to make me happy 🙂

Lots of love 🙂 ❤ xx

Instagram : sinhanamy97

Facebook : Namrata D Sinha

Facebook Page: Simply You(NamrataSinha_Blog)

I learnt being… Happy! — namratasinha97

Growing up isn’t easy when you got everyone’s eyes on you judging you if you do something different.Bullying you for being tolerant of it.Shaming you for looking a certain way, all of these make you change yourself trying to fit in. You give in to peer pressure and change yourself to an extend you don’t recognize yourself.Being different isn’t bad but trying to change to fit yourself in is.Learn to accept who you are and be happy with it.Most importantly learn being HAPPY without needing anyone.

Keep smiling =) Lots of love ❤ xx

via I learnt being… Happy! — namratasinha97